2020 Self-Care Tips from FFF Founders
If 2019 taught us anything, it’s that self-care comes in many forms, and there’s no one-size-fits-all solution for staying sane while running a company. Sure, there’s meditation and green juice, but sometimes, self-care is the little ways we find joy in day-to-day life, and take a step back to exhale.
For a long time, Rockets of Awesome founder Rachel Blumenthal never understood why “having it all” was considered a myth, but recently, she realized that to be truly successful, it’s not possible to be perfect in every area of her life. “What I’ve realized is that you can’t have it all, but you can have most,” she said. “The things you give up are up to you — it doesn’t have to be working out or seeing friends. I’ve acknowledged that I don’t have time to cook dinner (though never a favorite anyway!), I give myself a break if I’m late to school drop off or I screw up pickup, and I’m probably never going to be class mom. I’m okay with those concessions if it means I get most everything else.”
In order to get the most out of that most, making time to clear your head is key. Here’s what FFF founders do to create downtime and enjoy it:
Make a schedule
Ariela Safira, founder of REAL, lives off her calendar, so she’s learned to schedule her “me time” directly onto a whiteboard in her apartment. “By putting ‘real estate,’ ‘app,’ and ‘brand’ updates directly beside ‘exercise’ and ‘sleep,’ I am reminded that work and lifestyle are equally important. The visual reminder is a huge help for me!” (Before she switched to the whiteboard method, she was getting two hours of sleep per night.) She also makes time for weekly therapy, which she considers her “ reminder to ask myself how I’m feeling, to parse through what may not feel great, to find peace, and to breathe.”
Marah Lidey, co-founder and co-CEO of Shine Text, created a weekend schedule to add some structure to her free time. “Fridays are for date nights with my partner, Saturday afternoons are friend catch-ups and Sundays are for me,” she said. “My Sunday boundary helps me prioritize myself, allows me to more easily say no to a constantly full weekend, and be more intentional about getting quality time with my VIPs each Saturday.”
Once a week, Marissa Evans Alden, founder and CEO of Sawyer, goes out for date night with her husband, sans kids. “I also am trying to do one or two weekends this year with girlfriends,” she said. “Such a luxury!”
Find a workout that fits your lifestyle
While some founders take studio classes a few times a week (Blumenthal wakes up at 6 AM and does SLT four out of seven days), that’s not realistic for everyone. Instead, find a workout that suits your schedule. Stephanie Choi, the COO of Sawyer, loves 30-minute Peloton rides, for example.
Mia Lewin, the CEO of SpruceUp, is a hot yoga devotee, and considers the practice a retreat from daily life. “It combines meditation with demanding mind-body exercise in a hot room. It allows me to ‘leave it to the mat,’ restore, and rejuvenate,” she said.
When Alice Cheng, CEO of Culinary Agents is traveling, she squeezes in exercise by taking the stairs at the airport or walking to the next terminal, while Sophie Bakalar, co-founder of Fable Pets builds breaks into her day by walking everywhere. “It can feel really inefficient, but I do think we all have a tendency to over-optimize every moment of our work/personal lives and it can help to balance that with purposefully ‘unproductive’ time,” she said. “Occasionally I’ll listen to music or an audiobook, but usually I’ll try to just think. My most creative and exciting ideas over the past couple months have been sparked during those ‘unproductive’ commutes.”
Have fun in the kitchen
When Noria Morales, co-founder and CMO of The Wonder, goes to her house upstate, she spends most of her time cooking. “For me, cooking is like meditation,” she said. Right now, she’s a big fan of Sullivan Street Bakery founder Jim Lahey’s “No Knead” bread and Nigella Lawson’s Guinness Chocolate Cake. “It’s hard to beat sitting in a kitchen eating warm bread out of the oven, or cutting into a fresh slice of that cake.”
Even though Cheng is in the food business, she still cooks regularly. “It’s a creative outlet and money saver,” she said.
Read a book
Michelle Kennedy, the founder and CEO of Peanut, loves to de-stress by reading, and her top pick right now is Invisible Women by Caroline Criado-Perez. “It’s so great and very important for thinking about female-led and female-focused businesses!” she said.
Evans Alden is a big fan of Audible and listening to “books on tape.” Currently, she’s listening to Reboot by Jerry Colonas. Meanwhile, Kate Ryder, the founder and CEO of Maven Clinic, reads children’s books with her kids, which helps her to disconnect from work. On her own, she’s reading The Denial of Death by Ernest Becker.
Develop a nightly routine
Studies show that having a nightly routine can help you get better-quality sleep, and in 2019, our founders took their sleep hygiene seriously.
Jen Batchelor, the CEO of Kin Euphorics, considers her nightly routine the most important part of her day. “I’m all about finding time in the night to regroup and digest the experiences of the day,” she said. “The importance of a nightly routine is key to my maintaining stability, focus and general well being in my life. I also love baths!”
Christie Horvath, founder and CEO of Wagmo goes to bed at 10 PM every single night. She uses the meditation app Journey to relax beforehand. “It helps keep me accountable because I have to be in bed by ten to make my meditation with my favorite coach,” she said. “Doing a meditation right before bed also helps me clear my founder brain so I can actually fall asleep.”
Listen to a podcast
For some, listening to a podcast is similar to meditation or watching Netflix; it allows you to switch off your brain for a few minutes, get inspired, and recharge. Some of our founders’ perennial favorites include Oprah’s SuperSoul Sunday, The Daily (The New York Times), How I Built This (NPR), and The Knowledge Project.
Naomi Hirabayashi, co-founder and co-CEO of Shine Text recommends listening to Dolly Parton’s America, hosted by Jad Abumrad. “Dolly’s work ethic, graciousness, and humor is incredible, and an inspiration that crosses cultures and generations,” she said. “The beauty of having a Lebanese-American Tennessian mix his own marginalized experience with her storytelling and perspective is especially powerful.” Her co-founder Mariah Lidey is loving The School of Greatness. “I’m really loving the guests, and the vulnerability and honesty they bring,” she said.
Ultimately, self-care is about understanding when to take a step back.
Horvath gives herself mornings or afternoons off when she needs them. “Sometimes you wake up feeling like garbage, or the afternoon slump hits and you can’t focus because your body just needs a few extra hours of down time. Instead of pushing through it and struggling to be productive, I’ll listen to my body and either work from home or head out early.”
Over the years, Holly Whitaker, the founder and CEO of Tempest, has learned to trust her body, and take breaks when she needs to. “That means sometimes I leave at three pm, or have my schedule cleared,” she said. “I honor that I’m cyclical, and don’t give into the idea that I’m supposed to be a machine.”
And if you still need a reason to carve out time for yourself, studies at Stanford and the University of California at Riverside showed that overworking yourself is actually counterproductive. Every day, our bodies move from “a state of alertness” into “physiological fatigue” every hour and a half. “Our bodies regularly tell us to take a break, but we often override these signals and instead stoke ourselves up with caffeine, sugar and our own emergency reserves — the stress hormones adrenaline, noradrenaline and cortisol,” Tony Schwartz wrote in the New York Times.
So if you want to avoid fatigue and stay nimble at the office, do yourself a favor and take that deep breath.